Busy bee

After having done one+ month of internship I´ve found out that I am really not ready to start a life working full-time. The rhythm is so monotonous that I hardly distinguish one day from the other. Every day the routine is the same: I wake up at 7:30h, I arrive at the office around 8:30h, I go home around 19h, I have dinner, I talk around one hour with my mom, sister or Andreu through Skype, and around midnight it´s time to jump into my bed again. EVERY day goes exactly like this. During the weekends I am travelling to Zürich or to other places, and then suddenly it´s Monday again...

The place where I spend 10 hours a day...
You are looking straight at my working spot.

Before going to Erlangen I had many ideas of how I would fill in my life in the spare time that I would have after work, for example doing sports, playing music, doing some shopping, reading or studying Spanish and German, watching some movies maybe... But I simply don´t have time to do any of the things that I´ve just mentioned. My week is like 24/7 fully occupied and ´planned´ with all the routine stuff that I can´t avoid. I spend quite some time on cooking, because not only do I need to cook dinner for that evening, but I also have to cook my lunch for the next day(s), as I can´t really afford lunching in the canteen every day. Sometimes it´s like I can´t breathe, it´s like there is not even a single minute for ME.

Two weeks ago I missed my connection on my way to Zürich because the previous train was delayed. Since it was the last connection, I had no choice but to go home and take the train the next morning. I was really pissed off having missed my train, because it meant that we would have even less time together. The weekends are already too short...! What began as frustration turned out to be a relief. I spent the rest of that, suddenly 'free', evening reading a book lying on my bed, it was quiet and I had no plans or obligations. I finally had found an evening on which I had to do NOTHING but to relax. I felt incredibly well!

I am always looking forward to meeting with Andreu in the weekends, to do nice things together and to explore new places. However, since the time is so short, we are always in a hurry. It just feels as if we should take advantage of every single second, it feels as if staying at home is a waste of time. But this pattern absorbs a lot of energy, energy that we don't really have after a week of hard working/studying. I even feel more exhausted after the weekend than before. I write my blog during office hours because I have more 'spare time' then than in the evening or the weekend!

Somehow I hope that at some moment during my 6 months' stay in Erlangen, I will be able to find a good balance. I really feel that I need some time for myself, otherwise I will 'suffocate'. Actually I talked this over with Andreu on the evening that I missed the train. I told him that I was really too occupied, that I really needed some 'air'. He understood me very well. I am very happy that we can peacefully talk about any subject, and especially that we seem to fully understand each other. It origins from respect, patience and caring. I think we are really lucky. And I hope that we will keep this feeling for a long, long time....

Junkfood@McDonalds :P